IMDB: The Open Forum From Hell

Today, readers, I’m going to make a post about how a place like has gone to hell. Firstly- I hate elitism, even if I imbue it like a Nazi, I can’t stand it when people believe they are right simply because they got their first, or they’ve been their longest, or know more just cause they’ve had more time and experience. If there’s one thing I’ve learned from film, it is that anyone is able to make an intelligent statement, or question, even if it’s a first viewing. That is because everyone, EVERYONE initially takes a subjective, diverse angle on their view of what they’ve just seen.

Now, there’s two kinds of people who can ruin the experience of a forum user on IMDB.

    The first group is the gaggle of imbeciles who think awful movies are worth complaining about. I have never been in the forums for Little Man, White Chicks, the American Pie movies (at least the last three films), or anything with a studio budget but with quality less than a Sci-Fi channel weekly movie (THE CAVE doesn’t count because it’s quality was ON PAR with a Sci Fi channel movie). However, some people will “troll,” which from what I gather means to haunt obsessively, these threads in order to stir up needless bickering just because they have free time. True, it’s fun to make fun of bad movies. But if you’re going to either go on these sites and just hammer away at what is, in general knowledge, bad film making, then you are making worthless statements, such as:

    I dont think this is a good film, but yes is very funny. at least was more funny to me that White Chicks.

Now, that’s not exactly the kind of statement I implied, but while looking up material for my point, I came across that forum thread. Apparently, these people lack so much of a life, that they have to use one sentence a piece to compare crap to crap. I don’t care whether or not White Chicks was better than Little Man- both movies have atrociously stupid, characterless plots all based on stereotypes. Am I joining the gaggle of moronic complaints by making this post?

Yes. I am. However, my point is more constructive than that, as such that I’d like to see more people start threads like this, that actually deal with possible issues based on what they’ve just seen:

    You know what? I couldn’t find a SINGLE thread in this entire forum for this film that had one iota of intelligence. Never freaking mind.

See people? This is what bad movies do- they barely entertain, and then mind numbingly obnoxious people try to complain about them, or try to support them, but have no proof and follow giant, Grand Canyon like fallacies such as “You’re a queer” to fix their arguments into an unmovable position of RIGHTEOUSNESS.

Now, the second group of people that cause these problems are people who take similar statements, similar fallacies, and problematic gestures of stupidity, and bring them unrequested into forums of intelligent debate or friendly discussion. My proof is in the pudding on this one.

I recently went to a thread for the Michael Mann box-office flop, Miami Vice. Now, in all honesty, I love this movie. There are a lot of REALLY cool scenes among what is in truth an over bloated and lengthy piece. However, if I ever wanted to mimic a way a man uses his footage, it’d be Michael Mann- he has some of the best eyes for “cool” since Sergio Leone’s Spaghetti Westerns. The movie was critically panned, however, and left with a mildly disappointing score of 6.1 on IMDB’s poll. I can live with that, however, since this movie was really more of a film maker’s film. The mainstream really wouldn’t get it because they won’t understand everything that goes into something like this. The appreciation is more in the design than in the functionality, similar to Da Vinci’s flying machine.

However, there is a thread of fan’s where one poster has decided to answer questions about plot holes and technicalities (this film is very real, so a lot of things are left out giving the impression that the characters already know how to do their job without Video Professor), and I found this to be a very kind and exceptionally decent thing to do. He actually wanted to help people who enjoy the movie enjoy it more with an intelligent and responsive discussion about what he had noticed out of an admittedly nerdy 10 + viewings of the film. NOTHING WRONG WITH THAT.

So what does he get? Well after reading about ten or twenty entries down the page (it has a very expansive 73+ posts at this very moment), I found problem number 2 on IMDB:

The winy, arrogant elitist idiot who wants to ruin intelligent debate because the movie doesn’t live up to his standards. Here’s a quote from gayrzeee starting with his quotation of another user, who while his math is probably very wrong, is at least proving his point with facts and not “you’re gay.” He says stupid, but he’s making a reference to the way the guy was criticizing the film, not to the guy himself. Course, he’s probably going to take it that way anyways. By the end, he did try to tick the guy off, but out of all the posts gayrzeee has made, who knows if it is possible to stop hating on him at this point. Even I get into a tiff with him further down the thread.


Dear dyslexic *beep*
First, the movie budget was 135M, not 153.
I based all my comments on the facts that the movie sucked, Farrell and Jaime-not-my-real-name-Foxxxxx are way over-rated and overpaid Hollywood faces.
And lastly, I doubt there is any intelligence and any reason to think that a Brokeback dyslexic *beep* guesswork on the DVD sales of Miami Vice is credibe.
Donald Rumsfeld

So, what’s with the irritation here, guys? Why can’t you all just get along and stop yelling at each other on the net. If people were to fight like this in arguments in real life, they’d last for probably all of ten minutes, because past that point your throat is going to start hurting. Seriously.

So, here’s a post, that I put in response to this guy’s fallacies, and unnecessary flaming, trolling, and hating across all boards, in an attempt to show him what he was doing:

It’s amazing to see how this wasn’t even a thread about how good the movie was- just explaining away some problems with the plot that might be hard for some people to get (I’ll admit, it was a very confusing movie with a lot of pretty colors to back up its hard-to-swallowness).

What I don’t understand is why you need to come in and start wrecking everyone verbally. This is a FORUM. The definition for which is pretty much “public place of debate.” Also, cursing at someone and calling them petty insults is simply a fallacy of Bill O’Reilly like proportions. Entertaining, yes, but does it get us anywhere as a society? No.

I got into an argument with a guy on the Gungrave forums, and I tried like hell to avoid name calling and fallacies, but he wouldn’t just give up and go home after I proved my OWN point.

I love IMDB. But how can there seriously be this many people in the world who disrespect the use of Forums like you? Seriously, man. If you want to complain about how bad the movie sucks, write a review. Start a website, or at LEAST go to a thread about “did you like/dislike the movie and why.”

Give your fingers a rest and go do something else with your life.

Now I admit I bit into him at the end of my post, no doubt. However, at that point I wish there was a secret trap door to get rid of all people who troll sites in this fashion, who troll debates in this fashion, and try to cause nothing but stupid, backwards thinking. Liking a movie like Miami Vice isn’t crazy- there were some really great scenes to it. Hell, even liking Little Man can’t be all that bad, as long as you can back it UP.

However, the people on rarely take this into account- if you want to debate, write out a point, prove a point, and then elaborate on it to make it MAKE SENSE. Am I the only person who paid attention in High School English class here? It was certainly more than grammar (something Firefox admittedly corrects for me anyways).

From now on if I see a post like the Little Man things in an intelligent forum, or the Miami Vice flaming in “we’re here to help you” posts, I’m going to mark them as spam or complain to IMDB to moderate it. I suggest everyone else does too. It takes like thirty seconds, and will eventually, if spread correctly, get these trollers out of your hair.

Otherwise, just don’t pay it any mind. I try my best not to, but I really have a hard time over looking blatant, unfunny stupidity.

Later guys.